Coyotes Weep - The Night Series
Part 3
Starry Night
Sequel to
‘Song in the Night’ and ‘Cold Nights’
See warnings in Part 1.
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So many stars out tonight. Between the stars and the moon, it's almost a bright as day out there. I don't hate the days… much, anymore, but I still don't like the nights. Did Simon ever tell you why the appointment had to be so late at night and always on Monday? That's when my real life ended. I'm not here anymore. Just a useless shell. A mere shadow of what once was, and will never be again. Burned out like a star going supernova. The black hole is coming, but no one else seems to be aware of the event horizon except me.
Phoenix Suns play basketball… Dallas Stars play hockey. People like watching the sky and sports.
I don't watch sports any more. Especially Monday night football. The first Monday I was aware after…after he…well, after…. Anyway, the guys were gathered around my hospital bed. They had come over to cheer me up. The theme song for Monday night football came on. I threw up seven times in the first few minutes of the game. I don't remember much after that, but they said I had some sort of seizure and then coded. Scared the crap out of everyone. We don't watch sports much any more and never on Monday.
I like watching the stars. On a clear night, you can look up and it seems like you can see for ever.
Ouch! Oh crap that hurts. Sorry I get really bad pain in my arms off and on now. The docs all say it’s a good sign. It means the feeling is starting to return and the nerves are getting signals for the first time in months. They all seem happy about it. I guess I am too. At the rate I'm going, I'll be able to wipe my ass by Christmas… next year.
What's that you say? (chuckle) No, sorry. I don't think I'm schizophrenic, though the gang at Major Crimes might not agree. They said that it seemed like my partner and I were taking on more and more of each others' personalities over the years. Got to the point where they had trouble telling us apart.
I miss him so much. He shone so brightly in my life. His light should never have gone dim. We were a binary star system and now my companion has been ripped away. I'm not sure I can function alone. I don't want to. I know. I know I'm not truly alone. I am constantly surrounded by friends and some of those friends are as close as family, but it's not the same. I'm here and he's not. My soul is missing and each day it gets harder to fight, not easier.
Fini
Please let me know how you liked it. Cheryl